It ticks me!

I.m. in. angry. mode. I suppose. super. angry.

Coz I’ve been cussing (secara dalaman tho) since 8pm: 25/09/09. Clock now shows 2.23am – 26/09/09. Pheww..talk about being ’sour’ for the past 6 hours! The fact that I kept the cussing to myself,; not being able to blurt all the Fs and the BSs, made the anger lasted so long. Duh. Fergie said (or sang)…”Big Girls Don’t Cry”..but I guess “Big Girls..Cuss a LOT!”. lol. We just came back from the Arthur’s Day 250 Years Celebration in Sunway. I was hoping to have a bloody good time but the rest of the night was spoiled due to my ‘in-acceptance’ of that particular situation. If I had the car to drive myself back at that point of time.I would just skipped the whole B.E.Ps thing. I was furious! so I switched to silent-mode. Talking when you’re angry will only lead to stupid-fights. The anger I was in became so overwhelming, I feel ready to explode. Since I’m a lot ‘better’ now in controlling my so called anger (where previously I will most probably be clenching my fists), I decided to navigate away from the whole ‘emotional-disturbance’ by keeping my mind focus on the thumping musics. How I hope he knows what makes me tick. But then I question myself – How would he know what makes me tick if I never tell? Reason: He would never understand even if I ‘tell’ him because for him, it’s not something to be ’sour’ about. Eleanor is just being idoticly-sensitive. Yeah. Then all the guilt part comes back to me. So why should I tell. Sometimes keeping silent is the way to go…although it makes me feel like I need to stick my finger down my throat. Urghh.

It’s safe to say that I actually can ‘feel’ whether a particular person is a ‘yes’ vibe or a ‘no’ vibe when meeting them for the first time (does this gives the impression that I judge people too early? Blame the Gemini ‘power’ I have) So when the percentage of the ‘no’ vibe is a 150%, I would rather maintain a good minimum 1km distance. I’m nasty. at times. I give chances but few. If in any case I have to be in that 1metre circle and conversations are involved, I’ll be itching to make excuses and leave. OMG! reading back what I just wrote makes me sound so fcukinly-scary! But won’t be deleting tho. Blogging while you’re mad might only lead to nonsense, right? No? No.

So I started to have all these thoughts inside  my head. Possibly I should just let everything go. Again. Which I do best in life.

I’m going back to KK tomorrow. yey.

Biatch.

Urghh! I feel like kickin’ that Ms.Sucker right in the face.Repeatedly! (would I be liable for any legal actions with this kind of statement? Owh well.) She should have known better. Don’t go and whine about how pathetic and useless your so-call-love-live is everytime you had a fight with your Mr.Perfect-but-so-obviously-an idiotic-man, trying to gain sympathy with that stupid-sympathetic face of yours. It bothers me a lot when Mr.Good-friend of Ms. Sucker would keep telling me how he pity her. My ‘nice’ nature of just replying with a lame “owh really?” is destructing me when I actually would love to reply with “so what. fcuk her.” instead of the completely-monotonous”owh really”. Hypocrite. Me. Yeah. I know. I can be very nice (defining “nice” is up to u though) but can turn out to be very NASTY and BIATCHY at times. Keep telling myself that it’s purely a friend-to-friend thing, what’s all the fuss. right? No. Maybe. But still urghhhhhhhhh~~~

Come to think ’bout it, there’s just one good explanation to this…

I’m just…

JEALOUS (but I still want to leave my footprints on her face. Period.).

Dang. I need a box of donut with Mr. Smiley as the icing.

Super-licious strobery in West Java!

My first trip to Bandung was SUPERRRRRRRRBB!!!

• The nicest strawberry juice I tasted (so far) is found in Bandung, ID! I had blended strawberry with milk and it was like..super-duper awesome I tell you!!!
• Didn’t manage to take lots of photos – was walking from one factory outlets to another (lots and lots of them), distros, malls, streets etc and carrying my D60 is kinda heavy, so I left it in the hotel room. Brought along the compact Lumix but was too busy deciding on what to buy and cared less about photo snapping. lol.
• The weather in Bandung is quite cold, at times it felt like the whole city was air-conditioned!
• A lot of poor people begging for money along the streets (street beggars)- as young as 2 years old to maybe 60. Very kesian. It made me realized that people (like me) should be grateful with what they have now..at least we can afford to wear nice clothes, wear shoes and own a car. I saw kids who walk up and down the same street from am to pm. Walking from one car to another begging for $.
• Terasa diriku umpama Jutawan!! Carried cash amounting to 5 Million in our shorts!!! (in Rupiahs of course). lol.
• (besok sambung cerita. sleepy already)